 Rizou
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| 15 Nov 2017 12:46 AM
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I'm going to get all my jokes that I never used. But, you can post your own jokes.
Here's the first joke: What do you call a person who isn't afraid of water? An idiot! Why? Because a normal person would say, 'H2O.' Get it?
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Rizou
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| 15 Nov 2017 12:49 AM
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Joke #2:
What is a frog on the moon? A moonfrog! Why? Because it's a frog in the moon.
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Rizou
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| 15 Nov 2017 12:54 AM
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Joke #3:
Who was the fastest singer in the world? The one who could sing while running!
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Rizou
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| 15 Nov 2017 12:55 AM
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Joke #4:
What did one dog say to another dog? Good ruff!
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| 15 Nov 2017 03:07 AM
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Joke #5:
A man and his wife were sitting in bed, counting their money. Suddenly, the phone rang. The man answered the phone and said, "Hello?" Then he said, "That's a nice number." Then the man said, "Nope, we don't have an account." Then the man said, "No, I won't give you my name." Then the man said, "I can't give you that information." Then the man said, "Yes, I will be back tomorrow!" Then the man hung up the phone.
His wife asked him, "What is going on?" The man said, "We are getting a new phone."
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Rizou
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| 15 Nov 2017 05:48 AM
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Joke #6:
Once, there was a boy. He wanted to cross the street, but he couldn't. Because, he didn't know how to cross the road. So, his father told him what to do. His father told him to look both ways before crossing the street. But, the boy thought his father was talking about crossing the road.
So, the boy did what his father said. He looked both ways. And then he crossed the road. Then, another car came out and hit him. And the boy died.
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| 15 Nov 2017 08:02 AM
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Joke #7:
A kid was walking through the woods. When he heard a noise coming from the bushes. Then he got scared and ran away. So, the boy's mother took her son to the hospital. They saw the doctor and explained what happened to him. So, they put the boy in a bed. Then, the boy said, "Ding-Dong!" The doctor said, "What?" The boy said, "The phone rang."
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| 15 Nov 2017 05:19 PM
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Joke #8:
Once, there was a man who was playing the piano in a restaurant. So, this other guy came up to the man and asked him if he could play Chopsticks. But, the guy couldn't play Chopsticks. So, he told the other guy that he wouldn't be able to play it for him. Because, he didn't know how to play Chopsticks. Then, the other guy asked him again if he could play Chopsticks. So, the first guy told him no again. Because, the second guy kept asking him. Then, the first guy went back to playing the piano. And then, the other guy went over and punched him in the face.
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| 16 Nov 2017 09:01 AM
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Joke #9:
Once, there was a man who was driving his car on a road. He was going pretty fast because he wanted to get to his destination as soon as possible. But, he wasn't paying attention to his speedometer. So, he didn't see that he was going too fast. Until, he ran into another car and totaled both cars. And then he died.
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| 16 Nov 2017 09:03 AM
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Joke #10:
A man walked into a bank and handed a teller a note saying "Give me all your money or I will kill you." The teller said, "I can't give you my money, it is against the law." So, the man pulled out a gun and killed the teller.
Then, the next day, a different man walked into the same bank and handed a different teller a note saying, "Give me all your money or I will kill you." This time, the teller gave the man his money.
The following day, the bank was robbed for the third time. This time, a police officer was in line with all the other people waiting to be served. When the robber approached him, the police officer asked him what was going on. The robber told the police officer he wanted all their money or he would kill them. So, the police officer shot him.
When the police officer got back to the station, the chief called him into his office and asked him why he shot the robber when he didn't even have a weapon. The police officer said, "Sir, if someone tries to rob the bank again, we'll just be stuck with a dead robber."
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| 16 Nov 2017 08:31 PM
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Joke #11:
A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog, "Why aren't you drinking?" The dog says, "I'm not twenty-one yet!" Then the bartender says, "Oh, okay then." And the dog drinks.
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